Where has the time gone?

I was just looking through old pictures of Maddie when she was a baby. I can't believe how fast time has gone by. She has been my little shadow for 18 months. It won't just be Maddie and Me all the time. I think I'm going to miss it. Are little family of 3 is now turning into 4 and I'm just a teeny tiny bit sad and worried about it.

Don't get me wrong I feel like this new baby is supposed to be here right now and I already love him more than anything.

I had the strongest felling that we had a little one waiting for us up there.

I didn't feel ready nor did I want to be pregnant so soon. But I couldn't get the thought out of my head.

I finally told Greg and two weeks later I got pregnant.

It happened so fast that I can't deny that someone else is looking out for us. It took us a year and a half to finally get pregnant with Maddie. So I know this little boy is supposed to be here right now.

But still I wonder........

What if I don't have enough of myself to give to both of them?

How am I going to handle 2 kids? Are they going to feel loved? How are we going to provide for them?

I'm sure every mother and father have these same doubts and concerns.

I worry about it everyday.

I just have to remember that I am blessed enough to give birth.

Some people are not so lucky.

Some days when I complain about being pregnant I have to remind myself of that time when I wanted a baby so bad but it never happened.

Month after month.

And we didn't know if it ever would.

I remember being so upset about other pregnant woman who would complain and whine and say they never would have gotten pregnant in the first place if they knew how bad it was going to be.

I wanted to yell and scream at them.

And tell them.... I am wishing and praying every day for it to happen to me.

Be grateful.

I also have to remember that if you have faith that anything is possible. Anything. He trusted us enough to send us Maddie and he must trust us enough to send us this little one. I just have to believe in us, in our family. We can do anything.

Our lives are going to change but for the better. I can't wait to meet this little boy. I already feel so blessed to be his mother.

And to Maddie.....

I hope you know how much I love you! I hope our relationship will continue to grow. Nothing will change how much I care and adore you.

You have changed my life so much.

Thank You for choosing me to be your mother.

I feel so blessed.